Uncanny X-Men #157, May 1982
In Which We Discover That Hard Vacuum Pushes Piotr Into Another Potential Pushkin, That Kitty’s Chaotic Costuming Suggests That There May Be Such A Thing As Too Much Creative Freedom, And That Alien Industrial Design Is Mostly Genitalia-Based Because They Just Nasty!
X-Men #144, April 1981
In Which We Learn That A D’Spayre Family Reunion Will Always Run Out Of Apostrophes, That As Far As Cyclops Is Concerned The Color Of Money Is Ruby Red, And That For A Demonic Incarnation Of The Darkest Human Emotions, D’Spayre Sure Tosses A Lot Of Evil Spaghetti At The Wall Hoping Something Sticks!
X-Men #138, October 1980
In Which We Discover That Shi’Ar Culture May Overvalue Their Novelty Snow Globes, That Scott Now Has Both Rose Colored Glasses And Boots Made For Walking, And That One Can Not Underestimate The Value of A Well Placed Jacket Flap To Get Around The Comics’ Code!
X-Men #137, September 1980
In Which We Find That Five Billion Is Actually The Loneliest Number, That The Only Way For The X-Men To Save Jean Is To Go The Full Monty, And That Gladiator Does Not Want You To Hate Him Because He Is Beautiful!
X-Men #134, June 1980
In Which We Learn That Wolverine Ain’t Heavy He’s My Mutantly-Enhanced Mass Brother, That Beneath Colossus’ Metal Skin Beats The Heart of An Easily Distracted Poet, And That If Storm Hears One More “Let It Go” refrain from Nightcrawler, He’s A Dead Elf!
X-Men #133, May 1980
In Which We Find That Unlike Folgers, Wolverine Is Not Good To The Last Drop, That Bjork Has Nothing On Moira MacTaggart’s Fashion Sense, And That Jean May Have Just Earned Herself ALL The Racial Sensitivity Seminars. To The End of Time!
X-Men #132, April 1980
In Which We Discover That Wolverine May Be Murder On The Brotherhood of Evil Mutants, But He Better Watch Himself With The International Brotherhood of Electrical Workers, That You Can’t Toss A Rock In The Marvel Universe Without Hitting An Over-Priviliged Hellfire Club Member, And That Only Jean Grey Can Control Scott’s Blasts… If You Know What I Mean!
X-Men #131, March 1980
In Which We Learn That The Hellfire Minion Funniest Facial Expression Contest Always Ends In A 20-Way Tie, That 1970s Detroit Builds Nothing The X-Men Won’t Mangle, And That Kitty Pryde Is Just Not Sure She Can Deal With The Amount of X-Nudity Required!
X-Men #130, February 1980
In Which We Find That Wolverine Lives In Constant Fear Of Recklessly Fast Zipper Pull-Ups, That Like Many Girls Jean Grey Dreams Of A Traditional, Intimate Wedding In A Quaint Church That Only Partially Smells of Its Own Fiery Conflagration, And That There Are Two Things Dazzler Loves: Driving Disco Beats And Speculative Fiction By The Dean Of Science Fiction!
X-Men #129, January 1980
In Which We Discover That When Flying Always Check Where Your Closest Concubine Is, Keeping In Mind It May Be Behind You, That Wolverine Does Not Even Pretend To Read Them For The Articles, And That Frankly My Jean, I Don’t Give A Damn!
