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X-Men #66, March 1970
In Which We Discover That No Chrome-Headed Genius Can Resist The Siren Song Of A Size 20 Hulk Crammed Into Size 10 Pants, That The Craisin Is The Most Sensual Of The Dehydrated Diminutive Fruits, And That The First Thing Hulk Must SMASH… Are His Own Self Doubts!
X-Men #65, February 1970
In Which We Find That Cyclops Prepares For All His Alien Invasions With An Intense Series Of Kegels, That Real BFFs Should Brutally Attack Each Other At Any Provocation, And That The Loathesome And Terrible Z’Nox Are Secretly Beloved By The American Society For Betterment Of Scrabble (ASFBA)!
X-Men #64, January 1970
In Which We Learn That No Marvel Crisis Is Complete Without The Abject Terror Of A Hippie, That Bobby Can Not Even Stand To Steam Clean His Carpets, And That If Your Uncle Asks To Take You To Your Childhood Home Always Be Sure To Get A Becquerel Count!
X-Men #63, December 1969
In Which We Discover That Ka-Zar Loses Interest Fast In Things He Can Not Punch, That Cats Have Nothing On The Lives Of Magneto, And That You Could Take A Subway To China If It Weren’t For The Damn Mole People!
X-Men #62, November 1969
In Which We Learn That The Savage Land Tourist Board Is At Its Wits End With Ka-Zar, That Savage Times Were Shirt Free And Easy On The Eyes, And That There Is No Being Or Creature, Be They Alive, Dead, Or Sixty Million Years Extinct, Who Does Not Want To Punch Angel Right In The Face!
X-Men #61, October 1969
In Which We Discover That Doctor Lykos Seldom Walks Anywhere But When He Does It Is Like An Egyptian, That Face Punches Soothe Warren Like A Warm Bottle Of Milk, And That Sauron Has Much More Competitive Event Rates Than Those Uppity Goodyear Blimp People!
X-Men #60, September 1969
In Which We Find That The X-Men Health Plan Only Covers Maniacal Doctor Care, That Long Extinct Prehistoric Species Have Abysmally Low Q Ratings, And That A Guy Who Wants To Look Tough Should Really Downplay His Feathers!
X-Men #59, August 1969
In Which We Discover That Beast Is Not Altogther Pleased With Scott’s Commitment To His Personal Safety, That Our Future Robot Overlords Will Never Host A Pity Party, And That The Alphanumerically Low Robots Deserve An Award Just For Trying!
X-Men #58, July 1969
In Which We Find That For A Guy With Such A Biblical Name, Angel’s Religious Education Shows Some Fairly Substantal Gaps, That Havok Is Equally Well Dressed For Both The Tour De France And The MTV Music Awards, And That We Should Never Forget That Sentinel #8 Is The Baddest MoFo RoBo In The Land!
X-Men #57, June 1969
In Which We Discover That The Sentinels Latest Album Has A Much More Raw And Frenetic Sound, That Sometimes All You Need Is A Good Long Cold Poling, And That No Self-Respecting Criminal Henchman Will Follow Anyone Without A Monocle Or, At Bare Minimum, An Eye Patch!
