X-Men #125, September 1979
In Which We Discover That Wolverine Has Been Insufferable Ever Since Nightcrawler Broke the Keurig Machine, That Jean Grey Has Been Traveling the Mediterranean Learning the Tantric Secrets of the Yoni and the Emotional Voids, And That At Last The X-Men Can Really Celebrate Because Everyone is Not Dead! Well, Except Changeling, but F— That Guy!
X-Men King-Size Annual #3, August 1979
In Which We Learn That Logan Could Have Saved This Civilization If He Had Only Finished His Online Vocational Electronics Course, That Nightcrawler’s Greatest Nemesis Is The Rotary Phone, And That No Abducted Lady’s Wardrobe Is Complete Without A Metal Bikini!
X-Men #124, August 1979
In Which We Find That There Is No Crisis Storm Can Not Face Through Increased Teenage Boy Titillation, That Half A Villainess Costume Might Not Be Better Than None, And That Cyclops Found His Red Cross Training Got Him More Than Just A Renewal Of His Lifeguard Certification!
X-Men #123, July 1979
In Which We Discover That Ororo Must Be By Far the Cleanest Member of the X-men, That Colossus Has Finally Earned His Big Boy Pants, And That Arcade Has Managed To Merge His Three Greatest Passions: Homicide, Inflatable Latex, and Who Rock Operas!
X-Men #122, June 1979
In Which We Find That Wolverine is a Worker’s Comp Lawsuit Waiting To Happen, That On the Shi’Ar Homeworld No One Can Avoid The Noid, and That Colleen Wing Is Looking For a House Call From The One-Eyed Wonder! It Is Both Not What You Are Thinking and Totally Is!
X-Men #121, May 1979
In Which We Discover That Sugar and Spice and PCP-Ice, That’s What Calgary Is Made Of, That Most Supervillainy Is Just A Side Effect Of Grumpy Tummies, And That If Vindicator Is Not Careful He Might Just Fly His F-14 Tomcat Right Into The Danger Zone!!!
X-Men #120, April 1979
In Which We Learn That There Is No Shame Greater Than The Mid-Plane Walk of Shame, That Storm Would Be Perfect For Hair or Equus or Really Any Play Where She Can Hang Out Her Junk, And That, Yes, Banshee Did Try Adding Both Ginger and Honey To Hot Chamomile And Now Would Like You To Shut Up With All Your Home Brewed Throat Bullcrap!
X-Men #119, March 1979
In Which We Find That One Should Fear Nightcrawler And His Arsenal Of Swirlies, Indian Burns, and Red Bellies, That Colleen Wing Is Desperately Trying To Get On The Right Email Lists, or Phone Trees, or Maybe Just Set Her RSS Fields Correctly, And That Jean Does Not Understand Why Misty Knight Insists On Telling Her How Japan Is Super Boring And No One’s Boyfriends Ever Double Die There!
X-Men #118, February 1979
In Which We Learn That Colossus Has Both A Hulk Fetish And The Torn Pants To Prove It, That If Sunfire Drops Just One More “Woman” Epithet Then The Only Thing Left Capable Of Rising On His Torso Will Be His Sun, And That Wolverine Is The Best At What He Does And What He Does Is Love Anachronistic Geishas That Are Still Out of His League!
X-Men #117, January 1979
In Which We Discover That What Lilandra Really Wants To Be Empress of Is The Local Sephora, That Xavier came to Cairo for the Sex Tourism, but Stayed For The Astral Sex Tourism, That Twilight’s Bella and The Smith’s Morrisey Have Both Just Arrived To Tell Xavier To Cheer The F*&^ Up!
